RHONY Season 8: Episode 9 Recap

I wrote most of this post and then it got erased. I was so annoyed, I had to walk away for three days. But I’m back and finishing it. Andy did not lie- this was a top 5 episode of RHONY FO SHO. So much drama and the filters were off. And I love a cliffhanger, what will happen next week???

Dorinda’s Christmas Slumber Party Continued…

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B looks… not great in this flashback. We all get to flashback on how Lu thinks she came up with Skinny Girl? Or B thinks Lu thinks she did? It’s not all quite clear to me. What even is this B and Lu drama? Is this coming from no where? Dorinda is SO RIGHT. B is a sniper. I’m dying right now. Oh and now Lu thinks B stole her hair. I do not get it! But wow, B is really going after these women one at a time. First Sonja, now Luann. She’s ruthless!

Let’s discuss this girl code stuff. Obviously, Lu wrote the song about it, but what do we think about it in regards to Tom? I suppose she should have just mentioned to Ramona they were seeing each other. It’s weird watching this knowing that Lu and Tom are now engaged. Oh here comes Carole. And she hears the fight before seeing anyone and makes more comments about Lu and how she wouldn’t have come. MOVE ON. And also, Dorinda totally told you she was going to be there… or I’m sure a producer did!

Screen Shot 2016-06-05 at 12.22.56 PMTHIS IS GETTING INTENSE. PS, I made the Grey Gardens analogy before B did. Should I be a Housewife? Now B is yelling at Lu for supporting and “mentoring” Sonja but also bringing men back all the time.

I’m like WHOA right now. This is super intense, right?? Bethenny just served it UP. Lu’s not doing a great job fighting back. “You’re not a girl’s girl!” “No YOU’RE not a girl’s girl!” Wait. Wow. Bethenny just straight up called her a slut. That is NOT OK.

PSA: we will never get men to stop objectifying women, calling them sluts, bitches, etc., if we do it to each other. Slut is not an OK word…ever. This is coming on the heels of the very tragic story of the Stanford swimmer raping an unconscious woman and then only getting SIX MONTHS IN JAIL. A very close friend of my wrote a poignant FB post about her own experience being attacked and I’m so proud of her bravery but my heart hearts that she ever had to experience that. Let’s all stop blaming victims and continuing to allow the degradation of women, ok?

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Sorry for the interruption to my superficial blogging, but this is such an important topic.

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So Lu comes out to sit with Jules and curry up some sympathy….while Jules tries to get a hold of her father who has pneumonia and “may be dying”. I feel like if your dad is dying, you’re not in the Berkshires SMOKING. Seriously? Who smokes anymore? And if you did, why would you let a camera catch you doing it while you’re talking about your dad who is very ill from a lung condition????? I am FLABBERGASTED.

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I do really like Carole’s outfit.

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This Dorinda break down is EPIC and will go down in Housewives history. Poor Dorinda – these people are all assholes. And the house DOES look lovely! Invite me to the Berkshires, Dorinda, I will be the perfect guest!

Ramona is being the voice of reason, you guys. What is this? I love that Lu references her song Chic C’est La Vie. Luann does have a total issue taking accountability for her action and Ramona is making sense. Let’s see if she gets through to her…

I think the problem is that Bethenny has such PTSD about Jason trying to take control of her business that she goes insane when anyone talks about her company. We all saw what happened when John brought it up, although to be fair, he was being a total ass.

Sonja

Sonja is still a castmember so we quickly head back to the city to check on her.

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She’s auditioning for Fiddler on the Roof. Kidding, she’s getting a vagina rejuvenation, of course. The producers KNEW we needed a breather of comedy relief.

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I’m watching between my fingers at this point. That was the most uncomfortable few minutes in RHONY history.

Back to the Berkshires

I loved the Lu/B flashbacks. They really do have such a funny friendship. I want everyone to just make-up!!! Also, Dorinda is all of us needing to take an hour break to catch an episode of SVU.

Ramona tells Lu that she needs to text Carole an apology for calling her a pedophile. OR, you could walk 5 feet to the wall-papered closet where Carole is currently hiding and tell her to her face…just a thought.

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Ok so here’s where I lost the rest so I’m going to quickly recap it from memory. Bethenny and Carole talk about lesbian experiences. Ramona finally gets Lu to admit that maybe her words towards B were not ideal. This is Ramona’s reaction when Lu finally admits she did something wrong:

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So Lu sends another apology text. OMG GO UPSTAIRS AND TELL THESE WOMEN TO THEIR FACE. Carole and B are not amused. Lu and Dorinda then talk about the incident and Lu’s still going on about the hair and who knows what else and B overhears and they all get going again.

TO BE CONTINUED… (can’t wait!)

PS. Who else is SO excited for the dinner party episode of “Southern Charm”????? It’s going to be epic!

 

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